My Take on Sponsorship
It is recommended and highly suggested to get a sponsor to help guide you through the steps.
Nearly 22 1/2 years ago I first came in to the program I chose to call home. I have NOT found it necessary to use since.
I was beat down, no place to call my own. Husband in jail and kids living with family. I Surrendered and became willing to do what ever it took to stay here.
I asked this woman (who I knew before she was clean) (I couldn't believe she was going on 4 years). To be my sponsor. I felt if she could do this so could I.
She looked at me, gave me a big hug and said "let me ask my sponsor first". (I was like B you didn't in my head). All the courage I mustered up an approached her and asked that question. I felt deflated and was about to cry and started pulling away when she held on to me and said. " It would be my honor to be your sponsor, I have not been asked before and need to talk with my sponsor so I am sure I am ready." Well that was definitely more comforting.
She got back to me the very next day and told me yes. I did cry at that point. I suddenly felt worthy and cared about.
She hadn't remembered that we knew each other when she was using. I was clean in another fellowship and she was coming in to learn how to keep her fiancee from using. I truly was grateful to meet her then and again those 4 years later. To have her as my first sponsor was a humbling blessing beyond what any words could ever describe.
She asked me when my clean date was. At the time I wasn't sure. She helped me figure that out.
She asked me what my goals were. My goals then were to get "my life back" the husband, kids, finsh school, get the dream job and be the model family the rest of our living days.
She chuckled. I murmured it's what I want. She said "we'll get there one say at a time".
I stated ok then what should my goals be.
Again she chuckled, "Let's start by admitting you are powerless and an addict first." "Do you have a Basic Text?" Of course I do, I replied.
She suggested that I first take a high lighter and in the first 10 chapters highlight the words addict and addiction.
Oh boy I thought, my first real assignment this is easy.
She also suggested that I get women's phone numbers from Every Meeting I attend.
To call 3 different women everyday to get used to using the phone.
To call her everyday to "check in".
Find something to be grateful for everyday.
It all sounded easy. It sounded To easy!
I was thinking how is this going to keep me clean and when do we work the steps??
I wanted to be recovered tomorrow, I have these goals, I want my life back was all running through my head.
So after weeks of following all these suggestions I went to her and asked what now?
She smiled and said "How well do you know the Serenity Prayer?"
I replied "I know it, I have been saying it since I was 10 years old. What do you mean?"
She smiled and said "I am sure you do, now let's take it word by word from the Basic Text and a Dictionary. " Puzzled I said "OK, can you explain a little bit more?"
She smiled and said "Yes, in the index of the book there are corresponding pages to these words, read those pages."
So again I think to myself this is easy.
She smiled again and asked "Have you decided which group is your home group yet?"
I replied "Yes, it is ......." She said "Great, have you picked up a service commitment yet?" "Why No" I replied.
She suggested I get one. So I did!
So I began working this new assignment of the prayer, while thinking what Kind of service I want to offer to my home group. (Thinking I know all this and that I am going to be asked to do something greatly important)
Meanwhile back in the book there isn't a page indexed on the word wisdom. Well I forgot it was suggested to get a dictionary too.
I ended up reading the first 10 chapters again.
My home group business meeting comes and I speak up and say I want to be of service, what will you have me do?
Being all of 70 days clean they say, "Well we need a new key holder." Puzzled I say "What does that entail?" They laugh and say, "You carry the key, show up 20 minutes early, open the door, set things up, then stand at the door and greet everyone with a hug until the meeting starts." "Then after the ending prayer, you go back to the door, say good night to everyone with a hug and when we have all cleared out, you turn everything off, close and lock the door." "Are
You willing and able to do that 2 nights a week?" I said "That's it, we'll yeah I guess so."
I left that meeting feeling a little bewildered. Key in hand. I thought this was too easy for someone like me, not an important thing at all.
I showed up 30 minutes early, got everything ready that I could. Then took post at the door.
I greeted and hugged everyone. Sat down for the meeting and jumped back to the doorway after the prayer. I hugged everyone as they left and about 30 minutes after the meeting was all locked up and ready to go fellowship.
As the group and my sponsor expected, that first experience in this service position taught me how to open myself up more to others and a sense of responsibility. I quickly discovered how very important this particular service position truly is. Not only to others But mostly to myself.
Shortly after this I began Step One with my Sponsor.
To be continued......
I just passed 30 years of sobriety in November. Early in my recovery I asked people to sponsor me. One said she didn't think that I was ready to accept anyone. One said she didn't feel like she wanted to sponsor anyone. One said she had enough of people all ready. One just flat out said no, so I've done my recovery without a sponsor and never actually done the steps. Some have said I'm not truly sober. So be it. I haven't drank in 30 years and don't plan on doing it. That's not to say that I don't think about booze or how I felt when using it, and it's something I don't think ever goes away, but here I am.
Congratulations on 30 Pat! So glad to have you back! Why the hell would people have the audacity to say you're not 'truly sober'?!?! Because you don't recover like others? That's a bunch of BS in my opinion... 
I am grateful you are exactly as you are and I would love to hear more of your experience, strength, & hope!